This Football Blog

So, you know, given that I go ahead and make picks every week without knowing fuck-all about football, I’m thinking maybe I should go ahead and review the week, because, what the hell, I don’t know anything more now than I did then, so I might as well keep running my mouth. Here’s what you maybe didn’t see this week.

Arizona (+5.5) at Detroit
I said: Take the Lions and give the points.
The final was: Detroit 26, Arizona 12
So what happened? Well, as I predicted, Arizona’s quarterback du jour Josh Navarre had himself a miserable day, going 18 for 40 with one touchdown and four interceptions (i.e. he completed one pass to a defender for every four and half he got to his own teammates). And, also as predicted, Lions running back Kevin Jones had a huge day, rushing for 196 yards on 26 carries (that’s as many yards on the ground as Detroit QB Joey Harrington had in the air), and scoring a touchdown. Bring on the next victim under center in Arizona.

Atlanta (+2) at Tampa Bay
I said: Take the Falcons and the points.
The final was: Tampa Bay 27, Atlanta 0
So what happened? I correctly predicted that the Bucs would score some points and that they’d shut down the Falcons’ passing attack (Atlanta quarterback Michael Vick went 13 of 27 for 115 yards with no touchdowns and two interceptions). But I thought Vick’s ability to run would make the difference. It didn’t. Vick ran eight times for 81 yards, which ain’t bad for a quarterback, but it did no good. And Vick’s two fumbles (making for four turnovers in all), sealed the deal for Tampa. The Bucs remain in the playoff hunt, and the Falcons are still gonna win their division (they’ll likely clinch this week when they host Oakland), but they clearly don’t have what it takes to get far in the postseason.

Buffalo (-3) at Miami
I said: Take the Bills and give the points.
The final was: Buffalo 42, Miami 32
So what happened? I thought running back Willis McGahee would have a big day and propel resurgent Buffalo to a big win. McGahee had a so-so day (91 yards on 23 carries with a lost fumble and no scores), and it was actually quarterback Drew Bledsoe (19 for 30 for 277 yards and four touchdowns) who carried his team to victory. You still would have won the bet.

Carolina (+1.5) at New Orleans
I said: Take the Panthers and the point and a half.
The final was: Carolina 32, New Orleans 21
So what happened? As predicted, the Saints’ 32nd ranked D couldn’t stop the Panthers in the air (294 yards) or on the ground (132 yards). Carolina had trouble finishing its drives, relying on kicker John Kasay (six field goals) for most of its scoring (which won’t work when they host the Rams this week), but it was enough.

Cincinnati (+6.5) at Baltimore
I said: Take the Ravens and give the points.
The final was: Cincinnati 27, Baltimore 26
So what happened? I correctly predicted a humiliating finish to this game; I just got which team was gonna be humiliated. The Ravens, who gave us 382 yards in the air, are still the front-runner for the last AFC spot in the playoffs, but with a two-game losing streak going and Indianapolis and Pittsburgh both still on their schedule, their hold on that spot is tenuous at best.

Houston (+6.5) at NY Jets
I said: Take the Jets to win, the Texans to cover.
The final was: New York 29, Houston 7
So what happened? I said the Jets run D would stuff the Texans, and it did; Houston had only 93 total yards on the ground. I said Jets running back Curtis Martin would get back to form, and he did; Curtis had 134 yards and a touchdown on 23 carries, and 20 yards and a touchdown on four receptions. But I also said Jets quarterback Chad Pennington would be rusty, which would keep Houston close. Pennington went 20 for 27 for 155 yards and two touchdowns. That ain’t a career day, but it ain’t a bad one either. The Jets travel to Pittsburgh next week for a game that can’t turn out badly for the Patriots. So that’s nice.

Minnesota (-7) at Chicago
I said: Take the Vikings and give the points.
The final was: Chicago 24, Minnesota 14
So what happened? Well, I got this much right: I said the game would be decided by 10 or more. Here’s where I went wrong: First, I thought Minnesota running back Onterrio Smith would have a huge day against a Bears defense that had been giving up major rushing yards. He didn’t (13 carries for 79 yards). Second, I thought Chicago’s new quarterback Chad Hutchinson would performer poorly in his debut. He didn’t (18 for 30, 213 yards, three touchdowns). Third, I thought the Vikings were a legitimate contender. They aren’t. And if they manage to lose to the Seahawks at home this week, while they won’t be officially eliminated (it’s all but impossible to be officially eliminated in the NFC), they’ll pretty much have officially blown any chance of looking like they’ll ever be anything but a perennial choke team.

New England (-9.5) at Cleveland
I said: Take the Pats and give the points.
The final was: New England 42, Cleveland 15
So what happened? One can hardly get excited about having pegged this one right. Cleveland is in a major tailspin and the Pats are looking like the best team in football. So the Browns did just about everything wrong and the Pats did just about everything right. Academic.

San Francisco (+10.5) at St. Louis
I said: Take the Rams straight up, the Niners with the points.
The final was: St. Louis 16, San Francisco 6
So what happened? Neither team played well, but one of them had to win it. So the team that went in 5-6 came out 6-6 and the team that went in 1-10 came out 1-11. And no one was the least bit surprised.

Tennessee (+10.5) at Indianapolis
I said: Take the Colts and give the points.
The final was: Indianapolis 51, Tennessee 24
So what happened? The Titans’ 11th-ranked (going in) defense did manage to pick off Colts quarterback Peyton Manning twice, which cut down on Manning’s stats ever so slightly (he ended up with only425 yards and three touchdowns). They also held Colts running back Edgerrin James to a mere 105 yards and two touchdowns. Yup. Big day for Tennessee-ya-next-season.

Denver (+3) at San Diego
I said: Take the Chargers and give the points.
The final was: San Diego 20, Denver 17
So what happened? I said Denver running back Reuben Droughns wouldn’t be a factor against San Diego’s stifling run defense and I was mostly right. Droughns gained just 38 yards and one touchdown on 14 carries (he also had four catches for 35 yards). I also said Denver was in a tailspin, and I was mostly right there, too. The Broncos couldn’t get anything going on offense, largely because quarterback Jake Plummer kept throwing the ball to San Diego defensive backs. But I said San Diego was on fire and while they have been and likely will be again, they weren’t yesterday. Lucky for them they’re at home again next week against an uneven Tampa Bay team.

Kansas City (+1.5) at Oakland
I said: Take Oakland and the points.
The final was: Kansas City 34, Oakland 27
So what happened? Raiders quarterback Kerry Collins didn’t make too many mistakes, but he and Chiefs QB Trent Green pretty much canceled each other out (Collins was 27 for 41 for 340 yards and three touchdowns; Green was 23 for 35 for 343 yards, three touchdowns and one pick). But Chiefs running back Larry Johnson had four times as many yards on the ground as the entire Raiders running back corps. And the Raiders defense Bucknered one of the easiest fucking tackles in the history of easy tackles, which kinda keeps you from winning games in the NFL.

Green Bay (+6) at Philadelphia
I said: Take the Eagles straight up, the Packers with the points.
The final was: Philadelphia 47, Green Bay 17
So what happened? I said the Eagles would have a tough time stopping Ahman Green. I was wrong. The Eagles were able to stop Green (11 carries for 37 yards) for all of the quarter and a third in which he was an option. After that, they didn’t have to worry, because they were so far ahead the Packers had no choice but to stick to the air. I speculated that Green Bay would be effective against Brian Westbrook, which they were … on the ground. In the air, however, Westbrook had a big day (11 catches for 156 yards and three touchdowns, as compared to his 12 carries for 37 yards and no scores), as did Terrell Owens (eight catches for 161 yards). So I got the straight up result right, and I was off on the final score (I said Philly would win by three) by a mere factor of 10.

NY Giants (+2) at Washington
I said: Take the Redskins straight up, the Giants to cover.
The final was: Washington 31, New York 7
So what happened? As I predicted, the Redskins’ powerful run defense was able to shut down Tiki Barber (15 carries for 38 yards) and, with Eli Manning still soaking wet behind the ears, that was all they needed to do. And, hell, no one knew the Redskins could score 31 points in a game; they hadn’t come anywhere close to that all season. By the way, don’t expect Tiki and the Giants to fare much better against Baltimore’s D this week.

Pittsburgh (-3) at Jacksonville
I said: Take the Steelers and give the points.
The final was: Pittsburgh 17, Jacksonville 16
So what happened? I said Jacksonville would give Pittsburgh a game, and they did, losing when a 60-yard kick went right by like a foot at the very end of regulation. I thought Pittsburgh would pull it out by a little more than a point, though. With luck, they’ll drop one of these close games soon enough.

Dallas (+7) at Seattle
I said: Take the Seahawks straight up, expect a push against the spread.
The final was: Dallas 43, Seattle 39
So what happened? I’d say the Seahawks are in full-on collapse if it weren’t for the fact that quarterback Matt Hasselbeck threw for 414 yards and three TDs and running back Shaun Alexander ran for two more scores. Dallas’ rookie RB Julius Jones was most of the difference, going 198 with three TDs on 30 carries. That’s not necessarily good news for the Cowboys. Yeah, Jones is amazing, but 30 carries a game, while it may work for the remainder of this season, isn’t sustainable over the long term. They’ve gotta find more weapons. Seattle, meanwhile, though 6-6, remains at first in the NFC West, which really tells the story of how bad the NFC is. Sadder still: It’s entirely possible, with Seattle at Minnesota and St. Louis at Carolina, that week 14 will close with a team with a losing record on top of that division. (And there’s the possibility that a 10-6 team in the AFC will miss the playoffs.)